“Since having an abortion, I have been so depressed that I can’t do anything I enjoy or work towards my goals. The entire reason I had the abortion was so I could finish my responsibilities like school, but now I’m too depressed to move forward.” —Anonymous
“It’s been three months since I had my abortion and I’m still struggling with my decision. I don’t have the same passion for all the things I once loved, and I wake up with this unbearable weight of regret. I would do anything to turn back time.”—Anonymous
“An abortion is hard in every way. The decision stays with you all your life and forms a scar. It’s something I can’t ever erase.” —Anonymous
Abortion causes a unique type of grief that can be especially devastating, and only other women who have had an abortion can truly understand the complex emotions that surface.
One minute, you might feel okay, but the next minute, your mind is foggy and lost in what-ifs. Feeling like you’re on an emotional rollercoaster, completely numb, or somewhere in between is normal.
Whatever you’re experiencing right now is understandable, but it’s important to know that emotional recovery and healing are possible.
This article will outline what grief might look like after an abortion—which is essential for giving a name to what you’re experiencing. Plus, we’ll outline strategies you can take to get on the path of emotional recovery and healing.
Defining Grief after Abortion
Grief is a natural response to experiencing a significant loss.
While abortion is a significant loss, it can be difficult to realize that your emotional and even physical symptoms are likely related to grief. This is because the emotional implications of abortion, like grief, aren’t often talked about, leaving many women to feel alone in what they’re going through.
While many people describe grief as happening in stages, it’s more beneficial to view grief as a journey full of twists, turns, and bumps in the road. You might feel like you’re moving forward one minute, only to experience an emotional setback the next. This back-and-forth is a natural part of the grief process and is to be expected.
Grief will look different for every woman after an abortion, but there are also common symptoms you can look out for to help you recognize that you’re experiencing grief:
- Physical symptoms, like fatigue, headache, nausea, restlessness, upset stomach, trouble sleeping, etc.
- Mental symptoms, like confusion, trouble thinking, difficulty focusing, etc.
- Emotional symptoms, like sadness, numbness, apathy, regret, etc.
This list isn’t exhaustive. Whatever way grief is presenting for you after an abortion, it’s important to know that it’s normal.
How to Get on the Path Toward Healing
The grief that happens after an abortion can feel isolating, but you’re not alone in what you’re going through. One of the best ways to start healing is to meet with others who understand what you’re going through.
At Choices, we offer no-cost, one-on-one support or group meetings. Our sessions are led by trained facilitators and offered in person and over Zoom. Our staff has been in your shoes and provides ongoing support as you navigate this grief journey.
During our support groups, you’ll meet a welcoming, safe team who is here to listen. You can express your feelings and experiences or simply listen as others share their stories.
Don’t face this journey alone. Contact us today. We’re here to walk alongside you.